Master negotiator James Sebenius reveals the secrets every leader needs to win any negotiation.
The following contribution comes from Medium, which defines itself as follows: Medium is a space for human stories and ideas. Here, anyone can share knowledge and wisdom with the world, without needing to build a mailing list or a following. The internet is noisy and chaotic; Medium is quiet but full of valuable ideas. It’s simple, engaging, collaborative, and helps you find the right readers for what you have to say.
Ultimately, our goal is to deepen our collective understanding of the world through the power of writing.
This piece is by Jacob Morgan, bestselling author, speaker, and futurist. Founder of FutureOfWorkUniversity.com, exploring leadership, employee experience, and the future of work.
If you are a Chief Human Resources Officer or Director of Personnel, you can apply to join a new community I’ve created called “Leaders of the Future of Work,” focused on the future of work and employee experience. Join leaders from Tractor Supply, Johnson & Johnson, Lego, Dow, Northrop Grumman, and many other companies. We meet virtually every month and once a year in person to address important topics that go beyond traditional human resources.
High-stakes negotiations have become the norm in today’s business landscape, putting constant pressure on leaders. How can leaders close deals, manage stakeholder expectations, and garner the necessary support for crucial initiatives—all at the same time? James Sebenius, Harvard professor and co-founder of the Harvard Negotiation Program, has dedicated his career to analyzing the very essence of successful negotiations. He reveals that the best negotiators don’t rely solely on quick tactics. They use calculated strategies that set them up for success even before the conversation begins.
In this episode of Future Ready Leadership, James reveals some of the most powerful strategies
used by iconic figures like Bob Iger, Jim Baker, and Henry Kissinger—strategies that every leader can leverage to achieve transformative results.
Explore the art of negotiation beyond the basics, introducing advanced tactics that can help leaders turn potential impasses into agreements and gain the support of even the most demanding stakeholders. This episode will give leaders the edge in every negotiation, from the crucial importance of pre-negotiation preparation to the surprising value of empathy and strategic thinking.
The Most Important and Often Ignored Aspects of Negotiation
When it comes to negotiating, many leaders focus on the tactics they plan to use in the room: the right words, the right expressions, the right facts. But the real key to success lies in what is done even before the conversation begins. Here are some of the most important and often overlooked aspects of negotiation that even the most experienced leaders tend to miss:
The Preparation Phase: Much of a successful negotiation happens long before both parties sit down at the table. This “preparation” phase is the perfect time to align with stakeholders, identify key players, and sequence the negotiation steps to maximize influence. Preparation is where leaders can define the terms of the agreement, making it a decisive move in any negotiation.
Using Intermediate Moves: James draws a parallel with chess, describing the concept of “intermediate moves” as strategic actions taken before the final move to gain an advantageous position. By managing the order and nature of each interaction, leaders can steer the negotiation toward a more favorable outcome, often subtly influencing the other party’s responses and decisions without direct confrontation.
Balancing Empathy and Assertiveness:
Great negotiators strike a unique balance between empathy and assertiveness. James explains that understanding the other party’s perspectives and motivations doesn’t weaken your own position; on the contrary, it strengthens it by revealing ways to frame the negotiation in terms that resonate with both sides’ needs.
Sequencing: James also highlights an aspect that doesn’t receive enough attention: the importance of sequencing.
Imagine negotiating with a team of internal stakeholders before presenting an offer to an external partner. James emphasizes that the order in which you approach these people can drastically influence your success. By strategically sequencing your conversations, you create a domino effect that builds consensus far more effectively than a single, isolated conversation. It’s about taking a step back, thinking ahead, and ensuring that each part of the negotiation works together to support your objective.
These are just a few of the tools James describes, but they can radically change your approach to negotiation and help you build stronger relationships.
4 Ways to Improve Your Negotiation Skills
Success in negotiation depends on much more than just tactics. James reveals how leaders can use these principles to succeed in any negotiation, no matter how difficult:
Start by aligning stakeholders: Before diving into negotiations, take the time to understand who needs to be involved and at what stage. It’s important to build support among key players from the outset, allowing for a more coherent approach when negotiating. For example, if you’re pushing a new project or initiative, gaining the support of influential voices within the organization can often help smooth over potential resistance later on.
Think like a chess player, not a checkers player: Negotiating isn’t simply an exchange of ideas. Leaders must anticipate events, orchestrating moves that allow them to solidify a stronger position before the crucial moment. This approach, which James likens to chess, allows them to use intermediate moves—perhaps introducing preliminary agreements or framing issues in stages—that gradually steer the negotiation in their favor without generating opposition.
Use empathy as a tool, not a weakness: Many leaders underestimate the power of empathy in negotiation, often viewing it as a potential weakness. However, James challenges this notion, pointing out that understanding the other party’s interests can, in fact, provide an advantage. By listening carefully and addressing their needs, you can develop a proposal that benefits both parties while advancing your own objectives.
Focus on preparation, not just tactics:
Instead of relying solely on tactical maneuvers at the negotiating table, James advises leaders to dedicate more time to preparing the negotiation environment. Preparation involves identifying the opportune moment, understanding each party’s pressures and constraints, and anticipating objections. How a negotiation is framed often determines its outcome as much as, or even more than, the arguments presented.
The Importance of Thorough Preparation
Conclusion: Winning a negotiation isn’t about who speaks loudest or pushes the hardest, but about meticulous preparation, a timely strategy, and the ability to see the negotiation from all angles. By creating the right environment, thinking strategically, and balancing empathy with assertiveness, leaders can transform their approach to closing important deals and achieving consensus.
If you’re serious about mastering the art of negotiation, don’t miss the full episode with James Sebenius, where he shares more strategies and stories that could make all the difference in your next big conversation.
The 10 Key Negotiation Skills You Must Learn to Succeed
The following contribution comes from the Harvard Law School Blog of its Program on Negotiation, which defines itself as follows: The Program on Negotiation (PON) is a university consortium dedicated to the development of the theory and practice of negotiation and conflict resolution. As a community of scholars and practitioners, PON plays a unique role in the field of negotiation worldwide. Founded in 1983 as a special research project at Harvard Law School, PON integrates faculty, students, and staff from Harvard University, the Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT), and Tufts University.
At PON, we are committed to developing the theory and practice of negotiation, training the next generation of negotiation teachers, scholars, and practitioners, and helping students become more effective negotiators. We accomplish this through research, seminars, courses, conferences, publications, and special events.
This article was written by Katie Shonk, a member of the team.
Adopt these comprehensive negotiation skills to improve your results.
Negotiation Skills
Commentary
Negotiation Skills
Increasingly, business negotiators recognize that the most effective negotiators are adept at both creating and obtaining value; that is, they know how to collaborate and compete simultaneously. This balance is fundamental in comprehensive negotiation, where parties work to maximize gains before dividing them.
The following 10 negotiation skills will help you succeed in comprehensive negotiation while protecting your interests.
- Analyze and develop your BATNA (Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement). In both comprehensive and adversarial negotiation, your greatest advantage lies in your ability—and willingness—to walk away and pursue another agreement. Before sitting down at the negotiating table, expert negotiators take the time to identify their Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement (BATNA) and, whenever possible, take steps to strengthen it.
A good BATNA not only enhances your negotiating power but also helps you negotiate with confidence rather than desperation.
- Negotiate the process. Don’t assume that you and your counterpart share the same expectations about how the negotiations will unfold. Instead, negotiate the process before addressing the substance of the matter.
Clarify issues such as:
When and how often you will meet
Who will be present
What topics will be covered and in what order
Addressing these procedural matters from the outset can prevent misunderstandings and facilitate more productive conversations.
- Build rapport. While it’s not always practical to engage in informal conversation, especially with tight deadlines, even a few minutes of rapport can be highly beneficial. Research suggests that negotiators are more collaborative and more likely to reach an agreement when they make a small effort to get to know each other.
If you’re negotiating virtually or via email, a brief introductory phone call or video call can help humanize the interaction. This is one of the most valuable negotiation skills you can master.
- Listen actively. Once the conversation begins, resist the temptation to plan your response while the other person is speaking. Instead, focus completely on what they are saying.
Try:
Paraphrasing their main ideas to confirm you understand them.
Acknowledging emotions like frustration or concern.
Ask follow-up questions that clarify interests.
Active listening not only reveals useful information but often encourages the other party to listen with the same attention.
- Ask good questions. Integrative negotiation thrives on information, and good questions are key to obtaining it.
Avoid:
Yes/no questions
Leading questions (“Don’t you think…?”)
Instead, ask neutral, open-ended questions that invite further exploration, such as:
“Could you tell me more about the challenges you’re facing this quarter?”
Reflective questions help reveal priorities, constraints, and opportunities for value creation.
- Look for smart compromises. In distributive negotiations, parties typically negotiate on a single issue, such as price. Integrative negotiations, on the other hand, often involve multiple issues, creating opportunities.
Look for differences in preferences. Identify the issues your counterpart values highly but that matter less to you, and vice versa. Then, propose agreements that give each party more of what they value most, rather than splitting the difference equally.
- Be aware of anchoring bias. Research shows that the first figure mentioned in a negotiation, however arbitrary, can significantly influence what follows.
Whenever possible, make the first offer to establish your preferred price range. If the other party makes their offer first, pause to review your objectives, your BATNA (Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement), and the outcomes you’re seeking, to avoid getting sidetracked by an aggressive opening.
- Submit several equivalent offers simultaneously (MESO). Instead of presenting one offer at a time, consider submitting several equivalent offers simultaneously.
If your counterpart rejects them all, ask which one is closest and why. This feedback provides valuable information about their preferences and can encourage creative problem-solving. MESOs also reduce the risk of deadlock by shifting the conversation away from yes-or-no decisions.
- Try a conditional contract. Negotiators often reach an impasse because they disagree on how the future will unfold. In these cases, a conditional contract can be helpful.
A conditional contract is essentially a bet on future outcomes. For example, if you doubt a contractor’s claim that a project will be completed in three months, propose incentives for early completion and penalties for delays. If the contractor truly believes in their timeline, they should be willing to accept such conditions.
- Plan the implementation phase. Another way to improve the long-term durability of your contract is to establish milestones and deadlines to ensure commitments are met. You can also agree in writing to regular meetings throughout the contract’s term to review progress and, if necessary, renegotiate.
Additionally, adding a dispute resolution clause that includes the use of mediation or arbitration in case of conflict can be a good idea.
What negotiation skills would you add to this list? Leave us a comment.
Let’s Make a Deal!: Negotiation Tips from the Experts
The following contribution comes from the Stanford Business Insights portal, part of Stanford Business School, and was authored by Dave Gilson, a team member.
Want to improve your negotiation skills? We consulted professors who study and teach negotiation for advice.
Top Misconceptions
The First Step
Win-Win Agreements
Get Ready
When Is the Right Time to Negotiate
What is the biggest misconception people have about negotiations?
Margaret Neale: “Negotiating is a fight. Most people go into a negotiation expecting a battle. They get defensive, they get anxious, and when they expect a fight, they get one. The reality is that negotiating is a dyadic and interdependent decision. No one can force anyone else to say yes. I have to accept your offer, and you have to accept mine. Ironically, I don’t negotiate anymore. I solve problems. And I think that works much better.”
Brian Lowery: “People don’t realize how often they negotiate. In fact, you could say that any interaction where people have preferences and try to reach a joint decision is a negotiation. When you
